Why is My Engagement Down on Social Media? Everyone's Lurking in 2025

You’ve felt it, right? That quiet sinking feeling when your carefully crafted post - the one you knew would land - goes out into the world and returns with crickets. Maybe it gets a handful of likes. Maybe it gets none. Maybe it gets seen by one person (hi, Mom).

And if you’re managing social media for a brand or business, you’ve probably asked yourself the same thing our clients have been asking us at Sonder & Media all year:

“Why is my engagement down on social media?”

The truth? It’s not just you. Engagement is down across the board, and not because your content suddenly started sucking. We’re in the middle of a fundamental shift in how people use social media.

Let’s unpack what’s really going on (and what brands need to do if they want to keep showing up and staying relevant.)

The Social Shift: From Connection to Consumption

Remember when social media actually felt social? You’d post a photo, tag a friend, leave a comment, slide into DMs - and so would your audience. But over the last couple of years, the vibe has shifted. Platforms that were built for connection are now wired for consumption.

We scroll more, comment less. Watch more, say less. Bookmark posts we never revisit. And unless something is insanely relatable or wildly entertaining, we don’t interact. We move on.

Here’s why that matters: social media engagement (likes, comments, shares, saves) used to be a key signal for reach. Now? It’s just one tiny piece of a much more complex puzzle.

More Creators = Less Connection

There’s a content avalanche happening online. More creators. More businesses. More influencers. More experts. More everything - all competing for the same sliver of screen time.

When supply goes up, attention goes down.

Even if your content is great, it’s competing with:

• Ten-second hot takes

• Creators with production studios in their living rooms

• Meme pages, baby goats, and Taylor Swift edits

• A never-ending scroll of “productivity hacks” and morning routine reels

So, why is your engagement down on social media? Your people aren’t ignoring you. They’re just overstimulated. There’s simply not enough attention to go around - and engagement, as a result, takes a nosedive.

TikTok: The Follower-Killer

Let’s talk about TikTok, the disruptor-in-chief. Don't get me wrong, it's my favourite platform, BUT TikTok has completely rewired how we engage with content online. It doesn’t care who you follow, it serves what it thinks you want.

That means:

• Creators with 12 followers can go viral (awesome)

• Creators with 1M followers can flop

• And “following” someone no longer means you’ll consistently see them

This behavior has bled into Instagram and Facebook. Algorithms now prioritize interest over relationships. That’s huge.

We’ve entered the age of the post-follower era. Your audience might love you, but if the algorithm decides someone’s video of a dancing duck is more engaging? That duck wins. Every time. Can we blame the duck? Not really. The duck is cuter than I am. It's cuter than you too (sorry.)

Passive vs Active: Your Audience Is Still There - Just Quiet

Here’s the twist: just because people aren’t engaging doesn’t mean they’re not watching. Lurking is the new normal. People are passively consuming your content all the time, they’re just not pressing buttons to show it.

If you’ve ever had someone come up to you and say, “I love your posts!” and you’re like, “I’ve literally never seen your name before in my notifications,” that’s what we’re talking about. People are burned out. Tired of performative engagement. Scared to comment in case they say the wrong thing or are taken the wrong way.

So… Is It All Pointless Now?

Not at all. But it is time to adjust your expectations and your strategy.

Here’s how we’re helping clients navigate this new era of social:

1. Stop Chasing Likes. Start Building Brand.

Engagement is not the ultimate KPI anymore. Trust is.

Your audience might not double-tap your post, but they’ll Google you later. They might not comment on your Reel, but they’ll forward it to a friend. They might not reply to your story, but they’ll buy from you next week.

Focus on building a recognizable, trustworthy, and consistent brand presence — not just viral moments.

2. Create for the Lurkers

Assume most people will see your content without reacting to it. That means your post has to land whether they interact or not.

Make content that:

• Educates clearly (even at a glance)

• Entertains quickly (especially with captions on)

• Inspires or validates (without needing context)

Your best lurkers might become your best clients. Make content that earns their quiet loyalty.

3. Diversify Your Metrics

If your only measure of success is likes or comments, you’re missing the full picture.

Start tracking:

• Website clicks

• DM inquiries

• Saves and shares (even if they’re hidden from public view)

• Email signups

• Watch time and retention on videos

The ultimate test of whether or not your content is resonating is that last one - watch time. If people actually stick around for the entire video, you're doing well. The ultimate compliment on Tiktok is "I left this playing in the background while I pooped." That sounds wild, but it means someone intentionally tried to give your content a boost by bolstering your watch time.

4. Lean Into Community, Not Just Reach

You don’t need everyone to see your content. You need the right people to connect with it.

Start meaningful conversations in your stories or DMs. Post behind-the-scenes content that makes your audience feel like insiders. Reply to comments (when they do happen). Nurture a core group of superfans.

Social media may be shifting away from public engagement, but, as people finally remember their parent's words about the digital footprint, private interaction is thriving.

TL;DR? Here’s the Reality Check:

• Engagement is down, not because you suck, but because user behavior has changed.

• Passive consumption is now the norm. Most people are lurking, not liking.

• TikTok broke the idea that followers = reach. And the rest of the platforms followed.

• Your content’s job is no longer to get applause — it’s to build trust.

The Big Question: Are You Still Showing Up?

Because here’s what hasn’t changed: consistency still matters. Strategy still wins. And your voice? Still needed.

The brands that will thrive in 2025 and beyond are the ones that adapt, not retreat. They don’t panic when engagement dips. They zoom out, stay curious, and keep talking to their people.

So if you’re looking at your metrics and wondering “Where did everyone go?” - know this: they’re still here.

You just need to meet them where they are, not where they used to be.

Want help making your content work harder in this new era?

At Sonder & Media, we build thoughtful, modern strategies that don’t rely on vanity metrics. If you’re ready to shift with the times and still stand out, let’s talk.